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142

Voy

Padre,

voy

! I cry, as I quickly climb down the ladder that

allows me to ascend to the roof. My hand-stitched, red falda catches

on a splinted piece of wood of the bottom rung and causes me to

trip. I hurry to my feet and dust myself off. I don’t want to keep him

waiting.

Lucia!

The inside of my house is musky and dark. It smells of cigars and

rosary beads. Ever since Mamá became sick, all the windows were

nailed shut so she could slumber in peace. The floor is covered in a

thick layer of dust. I grit my teeth as it penetrates the slits between

my toes. There is a tattered mattress on the floor that had become

the confines of my mother’s life. Her position is unnatural – it had

only recently occurred to me that her rest was induced unnaturally

too. She was too quiet. My observations of my deteriorating mother

were interrupted by a purposeful grunt. I turned around. Padre

stood in the corner of the room. His back turned to me.

Lucia, why do you make me wait so?

Pardon, good Padre.

On the table there was a hand rifle.

Armado hasta los dientes

, he said insolently, turning around. Be

armed to the teeth.

He smiled falsely, his absent canines allowing me to see the

ulcers that lined his tongue – the result of chewing on tabs of

splintered wood.

Lucia, there is something I need you to do for me.

I grimaced in the dark, begging an unrelenting, heedless God for

refuge.

You must come with me to visit El Padre for his birthday fiesta. I

was asked to bring a date. And since your Mamá is… – he gestured

to the lump beneath the blankets in the corner – I must take you.

My stomach dropped and I felt the bile rise up my throat. I had

met this lizard only once before – the night of the lanterns. I

remembered grudgingly how after he had placed his grimy hand on

the small of my back and traced an ‘X’ on my skin.

Magnifico

, he

whispered.

I grabbed my back where the phantom signature lay.

But, Padre –

Lucia.

Hacer lo que hay que hacer

. Do what needs to be done.

A como de lugar

, I reluctantly replied. At all costs.

La Frontera

12